Grit Nation

April Fools Day Special 2021 - Steppin Tihsllub

March 31, 2021 Episode 7
Grit Nation
April Fools Day Special 2021 - Steppin Tihsllub
Show Notes Transcript

Warning!!!
Tihsllub spoken  backwards may be offensive to some.
Listener discretion is advised.


is From the country that brought us Volvo Automobiles, IKEA, and 70’s pop sensation Abba comes a revolutionary new technology that is about to turn the construction industry inside out and upside down. 

Tihsllub Industries, innovators of self-drive nano technology, based in Gavle, Sweden, have made a massive impact on Europe’s construction industry in recent years with their self-driving screws and self-hammering nails and they are now preparing to cross the pond in an effort to capture the American market and irreversibly change the face of Carpentry.

Haven’t heard much Tihsllub on your jobsite yet? Consider yourself lucky. 

In Europe it’s everywhere, in fact you can’t walk 3.3 meters without stepping into a conversation full of it. Having recently witnessed this incredible stride in what was once considered impossible,  I must say I am awed, amazed and somewhat concerned for what this means for our professional trades people.

So just what is Tihslubb? https://sites.google.com/view/hjalpcenter/home?authuser=0

In this special edition of Grit NW, we will find out. 

Hi, I’m Joe Cadwell,  host of the show and today I will dig deep into Tihslubb in an attempt to uncover the past, present and future of this game changing technology, and determine for myself whether this space age advancement can truly upend the commercial construction world. 

To do so I will be interviewing the CEO of Tihsllub Industries, Steppin Tihslubb.

The Show Notes


April Fools Day
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OhVCTkpVX2Y

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Tihsllub Industries

Steppin Tihslubb welcome to the show!!

Tack so mycket Joe. Det ar riktigt bra att vara her!!! Jag kan inte kommer ihog det sista gong jag var so upphetsad.

Oh, I mean Hello and thank you for having me.

Well thank you so much for taking your time to be on the show and for providing an interpreter to be able to have this conversation.

So Steppin. Tihsllub. What is it and why should we care?

Well Yoe, Tihsllub is the result of generations of hard work and dedication to better the lives of snickeres. 

Snickares?

Oh, I am sorry I think the English word is carpenter. Yes carpenters. To better the lives of carpenters by allowing them to use more of their time not doing the screwing of screws and the pounding of nails.

But Steppin, that is what carpenters do.

Indeed. But if they did not have to do these things, they can then have more time for other things, like the sawing of boards and such.

Ah, I see. So how does Tihsllub Industries make this happen?

Great question Yoe!! 

In layman’s terms, Tihsllub combines advances with quantum mechanics principles, string theory extractions and atomic layer depositions with level three blue tooth technology. This is then coupled with Apple products IOS operating platforms to manipulate assembler molecules embedded into the exterior coatings of common construction industry self-fasteners to achieve structural integrity in the building process.

So, if I understand you correctly, you are using an app on an iPhone to screw together boards?

Precissly!!! 

I call bullshit.

No, it’s called Tihslubb. Here, see it for yourself..

No way!!!” The screws are screwing themselves into the wood!!

Yes way dude!! You see it’s not bullshit, it’s Tihsllub!!

But that seems impossible!!

Yes, to many it may appear magical, like a gnome riding a moose, which here is really quite common. Ha!!! I’m joking. We would never let our gnomes ride moose. It’s much too dangerous, for the moose. But seriously, Tihsllub technology is firmly rooted in science.

So Steppin, I couldn’t help but notice a peculiar sound as the screws went into the wood. Why is that?

Yes Yoe, that is true. This is caused by the activation of the manipulator molecules. To be honest I have listened to Tihsllub for so long I hardly notice any longer. Same thing goes for the odor, which is very particular to Tihsllub. Some say it has an earthy aromatic to it. I unfortunately can’t smell it anymore.

Okay Steppin I’ll take your word for it. 

So now that I have witnessed this incredible feat of Tihslubb, how does it actually help with productivity and profitability? 

Well Yoe, by purchasing a Tihsllub factory production package, contractors can now utilize carpenter time more efficiently. Screws and nails are simply placed on construction surfaces, then activated by a swipe of a fingers. This free’s up time to focus in on other task as multiple fasteners can be set at once for simultaneous activation.

 Additionally, when combined with modulated system upgrades, such as our patented Tihsllub voice command controls, you can even do this hand free!!

Voice controlled Tihsllub?

Precissly, this is the preferred method. No longer will snikerers work tirelessly driving skruvas or screws as you say in English, with their hands. They only need to place the screws, hold the boards together and yell, skruva nu, skruv!! And the voice recognition software will do the rest!! 

Wow. That does sound interesting. And this technology I understand works the same for nails?

Indeed, though currently you are only able to set finishing nails. Our engineers are working to perfect the 16D and duplex self-hammering nails. I understand this should be ready for demonstration this summer at the International Tihslubb fair in Stockholm. Many hectares of Tihsllub to see.

That sure sounds like a heck of a lot of Tihsllub to me.

It is. You should come. The weather is very fine this time of year and gnomes are not nearly as aggressive.

I’ll keep that in mind. So Steppin. Aside from general carpentry what other fields is Tihsllub Industries looking to be part of?

Well the whole Tihsllub family, Lotta, Fulla and myself are looking to expand our great grandfather Jerry’s, passion for not just talking Tihsllub, but actually putting it into as many workplaces as possible. From self-driving pile to self-tightening nuts and bolt we aim to set the standard for Tihsllub in the construction industry.

We had hoped to strike a deal with IKEA, but they thought it would make their furniture to easy to put together so they backed out. 

Unfortunately also, our attempt to introduce nano technology in the culinary world, has met significant legal challenges. It appears there is some concern as to how much Tihsllub someone should consume in a 24 hour period. This means we will have to  wait and see what the future of self-flipping eggs, bacon and pancakes will be. 

Well, Steppin this has been a great conversation, where can our listeners go to hear more Tihsllub and perhaps even get their hands on some?

For the moment you can only visit our website. 

Our recent merger with Jerry’s Rigging Supplies and Sven’s Metric Board Stretching Devices will enable us to meet most of the construction industry’s needs. Look for us soon Home Depot, Lowes, Coastal Farm and Ranch and Target.

Steppin Tihsllub thank you again for being on the show. It’s been a real pleasure.

Tack so myket Yoe. Hejdo

Our guest today has been Steppin Tihsllub from Tihsllub Industries.

To find more Tihsllub including the incredible video from this interview be sure to visit the show notes. A full transcript is also available as well as your opportunity to win Tihsllub gear. So don’t delay visit the show notes today.